Finding, knowing, and accepting yourself is sort of like building a house. You have the framework, which if done improperly can cause the entire thing to collapse unless you find it and reinforce it in time; the foundation, which can cause the whole thing to implode; and the aesthetic parts which are collected over time and sometimes discarded when you’ve grown out of them. (Also, I’m bad at semicolons and have no idea whether they’re used properly there. Forgive me. Those things are like the weird uncle at the family gathering.)
No one gets to tell you who you are or who you should be.
No one gets to believe they’ve done yeoman’s work and “heroically” exposed flaws or weaknesses within you unless they’re your therapist, because they’re the only ones qualified to do so (in which you should be paying them handsomely and admiring the fact they have probably spent close to 8-12 years in college to be able to correctly diagnose you).
No one gets to dump their issues on you. Confiding and communicating are different. Flooding someone, refusing to listen, or lashing out, is not the same thing as communication.
A true friend, no matter what they’ve gone through or are going through, should never ask you to halt or diminish who you are to make themselves feel better. Doing so is an egregious breach of trust, not to mention a super shitty thing to do.
Someone else’s truth is not your own.
Valuing yourself is a hard path and not everyone will walk it with you. In fact, expect to shed more friends than you gain.
Doubt is an insidious thing. It creeps into your psyche and destroys your essence. Anyone who makes you feel like this, whether intentional or not, does not deserve to share the same space with you. It took me years to be strong enough to believe this.
Being human is difficult.
Being true to ourselves is even harder.